


Crumbed Confession

by Alette



Series: Winter Warmth, Winter Fluff [2]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 18:17:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9001357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alette/pseuds/Alette
Summary: Yoo Kihyun is at a Christmas party, nervous as all hell, and he can't stop eatingIt's all Im Changkyun's fault





	

**Author's Note:**

> With this OTP to the end  
> Fluff is not my strong suit, so critique appreciated. As always, all kudos and comments warm my heart, thank you for all of them!

“Seriously Kihyun, you're one cookie away from Type-II diabetes.”

“Shut up,” Kihyun snaps. “I can eat as many damn cookies as I want.” And just to prove his point, he shoves another sugar cookie in his mouth.

Minhyuk rolls his eyes and sighs. In a way, Kihyun knows his friend is right. He should be moving around, mingling and talking, not sitting in one corner of the sofa with a bowl of cookies in his lap. This is a Christmas Eve party, not some sort of cookie-eating contest. But he can't help it. He's nervous. And when Yoo Kihyun is nervous, he needs to do something with his hands, even if that something is shoving baked goods in his mouth.

In contrast, the source of all his nervousness is reclining back easily on another sofa, talking and laughing with his friends and looking much too attractive for his own good.

Kihyun just can't stand the unfairness of it all. Is it right, that one person could be both so charming and such a dork? That they'd have a voice so deep it was blessed by the devil, and then use it to act cute and whine? And that _nose_. Unfair.

“Kyeon you're staring,” Minhyuk says casually, and Kihyun quickly drops his eyes down to his rapidly-emptying bowl. Minhyuk laughs loudly and says, “You’re so cute. I'm sure Changkyun’s already in love with you too.”

“Shut up!” Kihyun whispers urgently. He sneaks a glance at Changkyun to see if he's heard, but God is merciful and the background noise is enough to drown out Minhyuk’s foghorn voice.

Im Changkyun. First year engineering student, certified dork, and the object of every desire Kihyun has ever or will ever have. He's styled his dusty brown hair away from his face in a side parting, and his smooth, tan cheeks have a natural glow from the warmth of the party. He's wearing dark skinny jeans and a beautiful, cream-white soft-knit sweater, with a silver cross through the piercing in his left ear to complete the look. He looks like winter made a god.

“I don't know why I have to be quiet anyway,” Minhyuk says, drawing Kihyun’s attention back, and he looks way too pleased. “Aren’t you gonna confess to him tonight?”

“Yeah, me, not you,” Kihyun growls. “So zip it.”

“He probably already knows, stop stressing out,” Minhyuk says relaxed, leaning back. “You’re _super_ obvious.”

Kihyun ignores that, until another thought jumps to mind. “You didn't tell him, did you?” he asks suddenly. “Minhyuk?”

“Chill, Kyeon, of course I didn't,” Minhyuk says. “I’m your bro, ain't I?”

That calms Kihyun down a bit, and he finds himself watching Changkyun again. He's been doing that a lot lately. He can't help it. Like a magnet, his eyes are drawn to Changkyun every time they're in the same room. Watching his small, cute actions, the lazy way he takes in his surroundings. How keenly he follows conversations without saying a single word, only chipping in with something to make everyone smile. Except Kihyun is always smiling when Changkyun is there.

He groans softly as he catches himself smiling again, and shoves another cookie in his mouth. Yoo Kihyun is a lost case, and it's all that noodle Hyungwon’s fault.

-

“So, this is Changkyun, that junior I was talking about.”

Kihyun pulled one of his earphones out. He'd been listening to WINNER’s new song, and as good as it was, the current situation seemed more interesting.

Hyungwon stood in front of the table in their dorm room, slightly defensive, like a parent introducing their kid to the class for the first time. Which, in a way, he kind of was. Changkyun was his kid, and the rest of them were the school.

The ‘rest of them’ were a pretty ragtag group of college students. They all hung out in the room Kihyun and Minhyuk shared, mainly because Kihyun was the only one who knew how to buy groceries and actually kept the room clean enough to walk around.

“Hello,” the new guy, Changkyun said, sounding almost grim. He had a nice voice, deep and smooth, made for serious tones. It suited his face. He was supposed to be the youngest, but he didn’t look it. His handsome features weren’t old exactly, but they were definitely older, especially compared to Kihyun’s babyface. He wasn’t tall either, particularly next to Hyungwon’s model height, but he dressed well enough to disguise his height, and he was lean. If he was only considering visuals, Kihyun would give him a passing grade.

“Minhyuk.” The introduction came immediately, bright and cheerful, accompanied by a grin. “Second year, business student. I actually live in this dorm room.”

The other introductions quickly followed. Jooheon pushed away his laptop to give Changkyun a place to sit, immediately winning him over with his friendly nature, as expected. Hyunwoo was quiet as always, but his smile was nice and genuine, and in any case Minhyuk talked enough for the both of them. Hoseok introduced himself as Hyungwon’s boyfriend, which earned him a smack and a shove from the latter, but the little smile on Changkyun’s face told Kihyun the guy had already been told. And then it was Kihyun’s turn.

“Yoo Kihyun,” he said. “Second year finance student extraordinaire.”

Changkyun blinked a few times in surprise. “Really?”

His surprise made Kihyun frown. “Yeah, really. Why?”

“No, I don’t mean anything bad by it,” Changkyun said quickly. “I just— I mean I thought finance students were short and dorky and, um, not you.” He stopped, and then suddenly got flustered. “I’m not— I mean, you're cute so I didn't— what? What did I just say? Did that come out of my own mouth?” He was even more flustered now, and looked almost ready to jump out the window. “I didn't mean that. I mean, you're not ugly, of course not, I'm just— am I making _any_ sense right now?”

“Nope,” Minhyuk said, laughing like crazy. Hyungwon was already curled up into a ball, his go-to position when he couldn't stop laughing, Hoseok trying to unwind him but shaking with laughter himself. Jooheon almost fell off the bed and Hyunwoo had to catch him, which just made everyone laugh even more.

Everyone laughed, except Kihyun. He felt something in his chest, but it wasn't a laugh. It was a… flutter. A weirdly warm, liquid feeling spread in his heart as he watched Changkyun awkwardly laugh with the others, cheeks tinged pink. He had dimples. Kihyun would never have imagined it, when he first saw Changkyun’s face. He looked completely different, now laughing in full as he tried to calm down a wheezing Hyungwon. The serious handsome man was gone. Changkyun looked cute, and sweet, and innocent. It was strange.

It was heart-fluttering.

“Hey Kyeon you okay?” Minhyuk asked, picking up on Kihyun’s silence.

“Fine,” Kihyun lied. He was most definitely not fine. Why was his stupid heart acting up for a guy he'd known for all of six minutes? “I’m still trying to decide if I should be flattered or insulted,” he said, and was proud of himself for thinking that up so fast.

“Hyung, I'm sorry, really,” Changkyun said, and he looked it. “I just meant you're kind of different from other finance students I've met.”

“It’s fine,” Kihyun said, but he felt his heart drop a bit. So Changkyun hadn't meant to say he was cute. That was fine. Kihyun decided that little heart flutter meant nothing, and that would be the end of it.

It wasn't the end of it.

-

Kihyun’s fingertips hit cold glass, jolting him back to the present. The bowl is empty. Kihyun stares forlornly at it, and then, like magnetism, his eyes return to Changkyun.

He's grabbed a drink while Kihyun daydreamed, some cream-topped caramel-colored thing. The sight of it is enough to give a dentist a heart attack. Changkyun puts the glass to his lips and takes a brief sip. A bit of cream is left on his upper lip. Kihyun’s fingers scrabble at the sides of the bowl, and he feels himself becoming increasingly stressed with every passing second, until Jooheon notices and points it out. Changkyun wipes the cream off with a fingertip, which he then cleans with a small, brief lick. Jooheon laughs and gives him a shove, but all of a sudden Kihyun finds himself craving sugar. Badly.

Minhyuk is nearby, chatting with one of his many friends, the really cute one from LA. Kihyun throws him a million hand signals, until he finally gives up and whisper-yells his name.

“Yes?” Minhyuk says excitedly, bending over a bit. “Are you finally gonna do it?”

“Minhyuk can you grab me that bowl of gingerbread men?”

“What?” Minhyuk frowns and straightens. “Why would you be eating gingerbread dudes when you could be—”

“Shut up,” Kihyun cuts him off. “Whatever dirty thing you're gonna say, just shut up. And get me that bowl.”

“You do it,” Minhyuk grumbles. “With how many cookies you ate, you need the exercise.”

“I can't.” Kihyun looks away in embarrassment as he mumbles. “Himchan-hyung saw me take the cookies and gave me a death-glare. He will flat out murder me if I take the gingerbread men too.” The night's host is like a hawk, watching for anyone who might possibly ruin the party. Currently he's tagging notoriously clumsy music theory student Kim Namjoon as he inspects the immaculately-decorated Christmas tree.

“Then enjoy death,” Minhyuk says. “I’m not getting you that bowl.”

“Oh yes you are,” Kihyun says, “otherwise I am putting cucumber in every single thing I cook from now on.”

Minhyuk gasps dramatically. “You wouldn't dare.”

Kihyun leans forward. “Yeah?”

A few minutes later and Kihyun is happily munching away on a baked man. He feels almost bad for eating it—that’s how well they were decorated—but he needs to keep his hands busy, otherwise he'll choke something. Probably his own neck.

Kihyun himself can hardly believe he's acting like this. Uncontrollably eating, sweating in the middle of December, barely able to think straight and nervous out of his wits… this was not regular Yoo Kihyun.

How did one guy come to have such a huge effect on him?

-

“I don't know why we have to do this,” Jooheon whined. “This is stupid.”

“It’s tradition, Jooheon,” Hyungwon said, getting comfortable. “Scary movies on Hallowe'en night. We've done this every year.”

“And I'm against it every year,” Jooheon whined even louder, grabbing Hyunwoo’s arm for support.

All seven of them were gathered in Kihyun and Minhyuk’s dorm room, lights off, _The Conjuring 2_ ready to go. Jooheon was sitting on the floor, as usual, (he was afraid of things sneaking up from behind the couch) with Hyunwoo and Minhyuk on either side. Hyungwon and Hoseok were curled up together on the same armchair, Hoseok’s face already hidden behind his sleeve. Which meant Kihyun was alone on the couch with Changkyun.

Changkyun had met the others sometime in mid-May, and by Hallowe'en had become a permanent fixture in their hangouts. After the initial awkward period he'd mixed in well with the rest of them, and he dropped by the dorm often to play video games with Minhyuk and Kihyun. Kihyun was okay with it. Sure, every once in a while he got a feeling suspiciously close to the one he'd had the first time he'd met Changkyun, but he'd gotten good enough at ignoring them. Heart palpitations, he told himself, ignoring the fact that they seemed to spike when Changkyun was around. Just regular, Changkyun-induced heart palpitations.

So he was also okay with sitting on the couch with Changkyun. And if Changkyun got scared then obviously Kihyun would be a good hyung and hold him close for support. Just Kihyun being a good person, no other intentions.

The movie started, despite Jooheon’s whining and protests, and everyone got comfortable. Kihyun tried to relax, and told himself he _would not scream,_ not unless he was actually dying. Not because he wanted to impress Changkyun, of course not, but for some other reason he'd think of later.

It was only a few minutes in when Kihyun was aware of Changkyun moving closer. He could feel his heart acting up again, and he willed it to calm down. If he got a jump scare with his heart in this state, he might actually die.

“Hyung,” Changkyun said quietly, when he was close enough. “I wanna ask you something.”

"Sure,” Kihyun said, only a little disappointed.

“You know I know about Hyungwon-hyung and Hoseok-hyung, right?” Changkyun asked, but it sounded like a buildup. “About the actual nature of their relationship?”

Kihyun glanced over at the armchair, where Hoseok had buried his face into Hyungwon’s chest. Hyungwon had his arms around the older, his very determined like he too had promised himself he wouldn't scream.

“Yeah, you only have to be in the same room with them for half an hour,” Kihyun said.

“Yeah,” Changkyun agreed. He paused. “You and Minhyuk-hyung have known each other for a while, huh?”

“A few years,” Kihyun said, not seeing the connection.

“A few years,” Changkyun repeated. He hesitated, and then asked, “Are you and Minhyuk-hyung… like Hyungwon-hyung and Hoseok-hyung?”

“What? No,” Kihyun burst out. Jooheon yelled and Minhyuk turned and gave a questioning look from the floor, and Kihyun waved him away. “No,” he said, at a lower volume this time. “No we're just friends.”

“Oh, okay,” Changkyun said, leaning back. “I was just curious, because you're always together and he calls you by a nickname and…” He trailed off, and cleared his throat. “Just wanted to know.”

“Well now you know, we're just friends,” Kihyun said. “I’m single.” He had no idea why he added that last bit. There was absolutely no reason to. Why would he add that like an idiot?

But then Changkyun was moving closer again, closer than last time. Kihyun’s heart was thudding in his heart as he tried to keep his breathing in check.

“Watch this,” Changkyun said quietly. Kihyun turned to face him and found his face just inches away from his own, smiling mischievously. Kihyun’s heart pounded even louder. _I really ought to go to a doctor,_ he thought as he watched Changkyun slowly slide his legs off the sofa. Changkyun stuck one foot out and gently poked Jooheon in the back.

Jooheon shrieked. Hyungwon screamed too, and both Minhyuk and Hoseok yelped in surprise. Kihyun burst out laughing, and so did Changkyun.

“Not funny, Kihyun,” Hyunwoo said. “Jooheon almost ripped my arm off.”

That made Kihyun laugh even harder. Hyungwon swore at him and Minhyuk whacked Changkyun on the leg, but the two of them just kept on laughing. As Kihyun finally calmed down he found Changkyun grinning at him, and he couldn't help but smile back.

-

Laughter from the present tangles up with laughter from the past. Hoseok said something funny, judging from his proud expression, and everyone around him is laughing. Changkyun too. His drink is finished, glass empty and on the table, as he laughs. He's moved from the seat of the couch to the handle to make space for people. It makes Kihyun both happy and annoyed.

He looks down at his bowl. This is so pathetic. His friends are at this party too, most of them gathered at the other end of the room, and he's ignoring them in favor of eating sugary food. And why? So he can work up the courage to confess to a kid who freely admitted to crying at the end of the first Pokémon movie.

Kihyun again looks to where Changkyun is sitting. He looks happy, talking and having a good time. Kihyun wonders if he should confess after all. What if it doesn't go right? What if it just ruins Changkyun’s night? And then the two of them can't be around each other because of the awkwardness? Minhyuk is so sure it'll work out, but as Kihyun watches Changkyun he isn't so sure anymore.

Why did he even want to confess tonight anyway?

-

“Happy birthday, Kyeon.”

Kihyun checked the time on his watch. “It’s past midnight,” he said. “Making it officially November 23rd and no longer my birthday.”

“Damn it, I wanted to be the last person to wish you,” Minhyuk said. “Who was it?”

“Me,” Hyungwon said gleefully. Hoseok gave him a peck on the lips as congratulations, and Hyungwon kissed him back. They were both pretty drunk.

“Hey, no lovey-dovey stuff in front of the single people,” Minhyuk said, tossing a pillow at them. Hyungwon caught it and used it to cover their faces as they went on making out. Minhyuk grumbled but didn't complain further.

“Man, I'm kinda jealous,” Changkyun said all of a sudden. It was the first thing he'd said for a while.

Kihyun just sipped his beer, and tried not to look at him. Changkyun’s now-fading blonde hair was tousled lazily on his head, and he'd bitten his lips red and shiny. He kept licking over them, which was not helping Kihyun’s efforts at keeping his head.

Ever since Hallowe'en night, Kihyun found it hard to look away from Changkyun. The heart condition had worsened, and it wasn't the sort of thing a doctor could fix.

He'd thought of saying something to Changkyun, anything, but whenever Kihyun even thought of it he could feel a cold sweat break out. What were the chances Changkyun was attracted to men anyway? Saying something would just make things awkward. So Kihyun just swallowed it down and tried to think of other things, like _not_ Changkyun’s dimples or his smile.

“What, of the two of them?” Jooheon asked. Next to him Hyunwoo was already snoring away peacefully.

“Yeah,” Changkyun said, leaning back and licking his lips _again_. “It’s not easy finding someone.” He paused, and then added, “Especially if you're a guy looking for another guy.”

Kihyun almost dropped his beer. The others got the implication of his words a second later.

“Hold up,” Minhyuk yelled. “You like guys? Why didn't you tell us before?”

Changkyun shrugged. “I dunno, it never came up.” Kihyun thought he saw Changkyun sneak a glance at him, but he couldn’t be sure. He was trying to concentrate on his beer as hard he could. His heart was going crazy, thudding as hard as it could. Was this really healthy?

He had a chance. He knew he was getting ahead of himself, but Kihyun couldn't stop himself. He had a chance.

“You idiot, you should've told us earlier,” Hoseok said, emerging from the pillow. “I could set you up with someone. Who's your ideal type?”

Kihyun tried to pretend like he was giving only a regular amount of interest, when in truth his ears were ready to fall off from listening so intently.

“I don't really have an ideal type,” Changkyun said casually. “I do have a… an ideal situation you could call it.”

“Spill,” Minhyuk said, leaning forward over the backrest of the chair.

“I want a confession at a party on a special day,” Changkyun said plainly. “Like New Year's, or my birthday, or… or Christmas Eve.”

“Aww,” Hoseok said, and the worst thing was he actually meant it. Hyungwon snorted derisively.

But cogs were turning in Kihyun’s head. Changkyun wanted a confession, from a guy, at a Christmas Eve party. That guy could be Kihyun. He sneaked a glance at Changkyun, who was grinning as he received rapid-fire questions from Minhyuk. _Christmas Eve._ It was more than a month away, and Changkyun had already said he'd stay in Seoul over the holidays.

Christmas Eve. Kihyun could do it.

-

Some instinct of Kihyun’s kicks in, pulling him out of memories. He looks up from his almost-empty bowl, and sees Changkyun approaching.

Panic rises up in his throat, along with all the (many) things he’s eaten. Kihyun’s trying to tell himself to calm down, but it’s impossible, not when Changkyun looks this good, a vision in dark blue and cream white, walking towards him with a smile.

Kihyun puts the bowl away and stands up, discreetly trying to brush away any crumbs and desperately trying to swallow what he still has in his mouth. Changkyun is now just two steps away from him, smiling and saying, “Hyung, what are you doing here all alone?”

 _Talk, damn it,_ Kihyun wills himself, and he opens his mouth to do just that until he remembers, oh shit, he still has mushed-up gingerbread in there, and then he panics even more and coughs and—

Sprays gingerbread all over Changkyun’s beautiful white sweater.

Changkyun just blinks, eyes wide in surprise. Kihyun is aware of someone (sounds suspiciously like Hyungwon) laughing, but he really can’t give a damn about that right now.

Kihyun swallows whatever’s left in his mouth, almost choking himself in the process, but he doesn’t give a damn about that either. “Oh, my god Changkyun I’m so sorry,” he says, and freaking hell he means it. “Let me get you cleaned up.”

“Hyung, it’s okay,” Changkyun says, but Kihyun is not letting him stand there with spit and gingerbread all over him, and is already dragging him away to the kitchen.

The kitchen is big, clean, and empty. Thank god. Kihyun doesn’t think he can take another person staring at Changkyun in barely-disguised pity. There’s a roll of paper towels, and Kihyun grabs a few and starts wiping at the no-longer white sweater.

“I’m really, really sorry,” he says, head down so that he doesn’t have to look at his face. “I was eating, and then you kind of surprised me…” He trails off because it is the worst excuse in the world.

“Hyung, it’s fine,” Changkyun says gently, and he sounds like he’s smiling a bit too. Kihyun isn’t brave enough to check.

“No, I’ve ruined it,” he says, and he doesn’t know if he means the sweater, the plan, the party, or just life in general.

“Hey, hyung, look.”

Kihyun forces himself to look up, and finds Changkyun looking up too. He follows Changkyun’s line of sight, up Changkyun’s left arm that is raised over both their heads, and to what he’s holding in his hand.

Mistletoe.

Kihyun lowers his head, and finds himself eye-to-eye with Changkyun, who is smiling. And then he throws away all second thoughts and kisses him.

Changkyun’s lips are soft and sweet, fitting perfectly against Kihyun’s. Kihyun can feel one of his hands settle on his lower back, and suddenly feels emboldened, and gently nibbles at Changkyun’s lower lip. Changkyun’s grip around him tightens and he’s holding Kihyun closer, parting his lips for him, taking his tongue into his mouth. He tastes like cinnamon and vanilla and things Kihyun has never even imagined, things he suddenly finds himself craving more and more.

And then, too soon, Changkyun pulls away and Kihyun’s forehead is touching his, and they’re gasping for air together.

“I like you,” Kihyun says breathlessly. “Let’s date.”

Changkyun pulls back, raises and eyebrow and smirks. “Really? I never imagined.”

Kihyun laughs and gives him a shove, and then pulls him back for another kiss. “I agree, let’s date,” Changkyun says, with their lips still touching, and then they kiss again. Kihyun thinks his heart should have exploded by now, if all those tremors had built up. But oddly, his heart isn’t thudding. It’s racing, yes, but it feels good, it feels right. Everything feels right. Changkyun’s lips against his, his hand on his back and his own on Changkyun’s cheek. It all feels perfect.

“Hey!”

Kihyun jerks out of the kiss and hastily pulls back, to see Kim Himchan standing in the doorway, hands on his hips. The host of the party does not look happy. Kihyun is about to stutter out some sort of excuse or apology, but Himchan doesn’t even give him an opportunity.

“How dare you sneak away for kisses in my kitchen?” he demands furiously. “No one is allowed to sneak kisses in my kitchen except me! Get out!”

Changkyun returns to his senses first, grabs Kihyun by the hand and quickly exits the kitchen, past a still-fuming Himchan. They rejoin the warmth of the living room, their presence unnoticed among so many people.

Kihyun suddenly notices the stains still left on Changkyun’s shirt, and frowns. “This might be permanent,” he says, poking at the stains.

Changkyun closes his hand around Kihyun’s, looks at him and smiles. “I hope so.”

**Author's Note:**

>  ~~This is an alternate universe where WINNER actually release songs regularly~~  
>  A different format from what I usually do. I'm not good with writing in present tense, but I thought it suited the story.  
> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed~  
> There is a companion fic to this, [Candy Cane Kiss](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9001291), in the B.A.P fandom :)


End file.
